muddled words of fear..

"me... mother, father.. understand.. not... painful"
I just said goodbye to a Korean friend (although I'm weary to use the word 'friend' without actually knowing his name) who I walked around with after Kom-do (Korean sword fighting). Every night after work I head over to the Kom-do place and take part in the fifty minute training sessions. I find it's one way to get in some exercise in an otherwise un-strenuous day.
Anyways, this Korean friend of mine asked me (using his VERY small English vocabulary) if I would get Ice cream with him. So we went out, and had some ice cream (on a stick) - his treat. I told him that I would treat him the next time that we went out.
That next time was tonight. We went out after Kom-do and I treated him to Dokk-bu-kee (kind of a rice textured tube in a spicy/sweet sauce). After we had finished, it got kind of awkward. I wanted to go home, make some food and then sleep, but he seemed to want to walk and talk. So, we walked. A while later, after walking up and down streets attempting communication with one another, I decided to go home. I told him that I wanted sleep and started toward home. He tagged along and said that he would walk to my house. It wasn't too late so I said I led him to my apartment. I really think that hanging out with a foreigner in public really boosts the status of Korean people, and that's why I think we walked around together. I'm getting to the quote above, don't worry..
So at my house, after looking at my Korean- English dictionary he starts spilling out all these fears that he has about returning home. He says "me... father, fearfull", and points to a Korean word where beside it states it's synonyms: "ill treatment", "treat badly", "abuse". From what I understood of the conversation was that, because he had no job, his parents treated him badly. In Becky's school it is encouraged for the teachers to discipline the children by hitting them, often with a bamboo stick. I'm not sure what parents are allowed to do to their children, but I'm sure it's probably worse. My friend is 29 years old, but even grown men here have quite a high level of reverence toward their parents. If he were beaten, he would probably be beaten badly.
I didn't know what to say to him. "home going... want.. no", he would mutter. We were both holding dictionaries; him with his cellphone dictionary, and me with my book. In between the frantic looking up of words, his father called. And then called again. I don't understand much of the Korean that is spoken here, but one of the first things I looked up was the swear words. "She-bal" otherwise known as "fuck you" (or something to that effect), was said every second word in the phone conversation between father and son. Full of remorse, and fear, my friend headed toward the door. "me talking... late... sorry", he would apologize for staying as long as he did at my apartment. sigh.. what do I do? What can he, or anyone like him do in his situation? The way of life here is SO different than at home. There is no comment that I could make, no consolation that I could provide. Although I turned to the bright side and told him that we'd go for chicken and mek-chu (beer) after the next Kom-do practice, the same fear and sorrow still gripped his face.
I'm not sure how to handle the domestic disputes that happen here, besides turning my head and looking the other way. Not my culture- things are done differently here. But still, I see the stressed out kids at my school; I read about the attempted suicides of kids who have to take the nationwide tests determining whether they make it into good high schools or not; I hear stories of kids living with their grandparents because their parents split up, leaving nobody legally responsible for the child, and I think... this is terrible. There are some amazing roses in Korean culture, but tonight, I can't seem to get past the thorns.